


Focal Point

by TheStanByMe



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: First Kiss, Kinda, M/M, memory recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 14:36:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9553004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheStanByMe/pseuds/TheStanByMe
Summary: Trying to remember Ford, Stan gets stuck on something very specific.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Stancest Week 2017 - Grunkle Stans

Some of Stanley's memories, as he got them, left him decidedly confused. Ford assured him that it was only natural. He was missing important context in many cases. He'd lived a long life and it had apparently also been a hectic one, at least in his youth.

Frankly, some of those memories made Stanley wonder just what kind of a person he was. It wasn't really the memories of criminal activity or time spent in jail. Your personality didn't get altered with memory loss, Ford had explained. Stanley was pretty crooked even now and didn't really bat an eye at some of the stuff he'd done in order to make money.

Stanford explained a lot of things to Stanley. The man had this desperate eagerness to talk about the building blocks of personality and identity and Stanley always felt so incredibly fond whenever Ford prattled on with such gusto. There was some empathy too, as Stanley suspected that Ford was dealing with his own fears and anxiety by doing all this research for Stanley and then sharing it with him.

Stanley knew he was a family man. He adored the kids and he'd loved them even before he remembered the experiences that had cultivated that love. He was fond of his employees, the girl Wendy and the man Soos feeling like they belonged even before he remembered how well the two fit into their family moments, an irreplaceable part of the whole. He even felt affection in his chest when Ford came close, even as the two of them still worked to restore Stanley's ancient memories of a shared childhood and everything that came after.

Stanford was close to Stanley a lot. He hovered in the back whenever Stanley spoke to someone. His hands practically clung to Stanley whenever he tried to direct him somewhere. His hands touched Stanley gently on any provocation, on the slightest excuse and sometimes even just because while the two men talked.

It was easy to understand where it all came from. Stanford was his brother, and they'd apparently been taking each other for granted for far too long. Of course Stanford was full of care and particularly clingy. At least that was how the kids saw it, looking incredibly pleased as they said that it was nice that they were getting along.

It all made Stanley feel guilty, and wonder about just what kind of a person his original self had been. It was all because there were all these perfectly reasonable, _familial_ reasons for everything and yet Stanley had to ruin it. Whenever Ford touched him or got close enough to see the flecks of soot on his face, a sign that he'd been careless shaving that morning, Stanley had to actively stop himself from leaning into all those touches, from invading the other's space.

The more time Stanley spent around Stanford, the more he wanted to kiss him. And Stanley was reasonably certain that the him before his memory loss had also wanted to kiss Stanford. Because the desire didn't feel foreign or out of place. It felt disturbingly natural, like that was just the way things are. It was a rule of nature, how things worked. Stanley Pines wanted to kiss Stanford Pines. Always. The end.

So, apparently Stan Pines had always been into his brother. Or, he'd been into Ford a while, since it came to Stanley so naturally. However, Stanley wasn't entirely sure just how one-sided it was. He couldn't remember if he was supposed to resist enjoying Ford's closeness, if it was something that was okay for Ford to know about. And then there was Ford himself.

Stanley wanted to know how Ford felt about him. Was Ford in the dark and would be completely opposed to his brother falling in love with him? Was he in the dark and feeling equally unrequited? Was he aware but ignored it or was it something mutual that Ford was waiting for Stanley to remember?

So many questions. And Stanley couldn't remember the answers, or even if he'd ever even known them.

He did remember a bunch of things, as he thought about Ford and about loving Ford, while sitting out on the back porch. Stanley remembered two kids being as close as they could be. He remembered contentment when they were together and agony when they were apart. He remembered relief when they were reunited and aching when he still had to wait, wait, wait...

"You're looking thoughtful." Speak of the devil, that was Ford seating himself next to Stanley on the couch. "I doubt the woods are what has you looking so intent."

Frankly, the view of the forest from the porch was boring yet soothing in a way that suggested it was a very familiar view. But no, Stanley still wasn't going to go looking for answers there. He slumped back in his seat, trying to get his high-strung body to relax into the well-worn cushions.

"Okay," Stanley said, knowing that Ford was really asking if he was about to share. "So, I can't really remember much from way back but I know-" He cut himself off as he turned to look as Ford's expectant face. Ford had been very kind to him while he was recovering. Did he deserve to hear this? Did he deserve to be ignorant? There was really no way to judge the value of this knowledge to Ford, but Stanley supposed there was nothing more to it than coming clean.

"I know you're the most gorgeous man I've ever seen, for a fact." Flattery was good, a distinct part of him supplied, even as he felt absolutely ridiculous for spouting this drivel.

Ford laughed, but it wasn't from amusement. It was a nervous, stuttering thing that was brushed aside when Ford hurried to ask: "Are you teasing me?"

Stanley didn't respond, hoping his expression would convey what he wasn't quite ready to say out loud. He studied Ford's face carefully, wanting to see which way his reaction would fall.

Ford's eyes widened when the realization registered. Then he flushed red, the color creeping up from his collar, sweeping across his cheeks and alighting his ears. Ford pressed a hand to his mouth, the epitome of someone who'd just been flattered and charmed.

Stanley recalled that his brother had never been too good at faking his moods, although he did recall some instances around the house where Ford would make himself impassive when he couldn't muster an insincere response to anything or when he didn't want to give any hints to what he was feeling.

A lazy smile stretched across Stanley's lips and he made himself comfortable on the couch, lifting a leg onto the cushions and turning his entire body towards Ford. "I guess I never told you anything like that before?"

Ford frowned, lowering his hand. "On occasion, yes, but I always assumed you were joking." The frown deepened and Ford pinched his chin in a thoughtful gesture. "Maybe you weren't." He hummed thoughtfully as he no doubt started trying to remember every single occasion Stanley had ever flirted with him in the past.

Sighing in exasperated fondness at how easily distracted Ford could be, Stanley leaned forward, invading Ford's space until the other was forced to focus on him again. Stanley smiled, hoping it looked charming instead of nervous. "So, how about it?"

Face reddening once more, Ford floundered to respond: "A-are you sure? You're still recovering your memories."

"Hey." Stanley reached out and touched Ford's face, soothing the other by rubbing a thumb against a hot cheek. "I'm not sure of a lot of things, but it's mostly just fluff from the years in between and some really old stuff." He coached Ford to lean forward, cutting the scant distance between them some more. "I'm pretty dang sure of this, though." He remembered this nerd. He remembered _loving_ this nerd. Really, his reactions now were little more than muscle memory, judging by how young he could recall being while thinking about how much he loved Ford.

"How about you?" Stanley asked then. "Are you sure?"

Ford laughed, a short chuckle, more of a release of breath than anything and too brief to analyze. The look he gave Stanley was unfathomable. "Like I'd ever say no to this." With that Ford was the one to remove the last of the distance between them, kissing Stanley gently but deeply.

This was familiar, Stanley realized. They'd done this before. He wrapped his arms around Ford as tightly as he could and noticed Ford clinging back just as desperately. Stanley felt something inside his chest unwind and knew that they were cutting off more than just physical distance here. Emotionally, they'd been apart for far too long.

Never again.


End file.
